Robert Pattinson Merchandise You Never Knew You Needed : Part 2

You know you can count on us to show you Robert Pattinson things that you never knew you needed. Earlier in the week we told you about this well now here is something else that no fan can do without :-/
Yes now you too can have your very own Paper Pattinson (seriously who comes up with this stuff ?)

He comes with his very own set of Ray Bans, cigarette, stubble & wild hair (although you can't run your figers through it.) I wonder if I put him in the back of my car would his head bob up and down like those nodding dogs, it looks like it should :-)
Oh what next?? LOL

Source Thanks to clabozolinas for the link!

63 comments:

Leenie FJ said...

Oy.

Lisa said...

OMG I actually just guffawed out loud when I saw the cigarette!

BWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAAA!!!!


I should get this for my desk at work...what???

Brooke Moss said...

You can't make out with a paper pattinson.

RTP_KJS_Lover said...

Is it bad that I want one?

Fae007 said...

OMG!
DISTURBING!

Gwen Cooper 426 said...

Uh, no.

Mother After God's Own Heart said...

BWHAHAHAH!

Well, it's a lot better than the freaking manlow. That was just...scary

nikola6 said...

What's next? Well Kate, I think you said it.

The Rob Pattinson Bobble Head Doll.

Now THAT'S something I could actually get behind AND I'd put him on the shelf right next to my Charlie Chaplin, Cal Ripken and Daffy Duck bobble heads. (Christ. Those four heads together would look like a boy band from bizarro world) AND...

I'm sure we could set up a display case of them in "The Sparkling Peen Sex Shop." Right next to the 'blow up dolls' display. Which would of course be right next to the flip up freezer in which would be kept...the 'jizzy pops'.

Of course.

MiCh said...

And he has a cigarette! BWAHAHAHAHAHA..

I want one.. ooops, did I type that out loud? Hehehe..

Marna said...

I would just like to point out that paper disintergrates if it gets wet. This is just a reminder for some of you. You know who you are. :-)

MiCh said...

I spy with my little eye.. a bit of chest hair!

Now I really want a Paper Rob n_n

Angie said...

No...just nooooooooo!

Lisa said...

So, Marna, are you saying this can't be rinsed off and reused?




...I'm just askin'....

wensdazzled by ThePretty said...

@marna--LOL

RTP_KJS_Lover said...

@Marna - LOL! That's disgusting, but I love it.

Gwen Cooper 426 said...

@Marna! LOL, just spit coffee all over keyboard. Ewwwww.

Juh said...

Source here! Hi! This papertoy is great! Chest hair and everything!LOL

womadsart said...

NO CL!!! I want one too! They are sooo cute.. Cute paper disintegrating Rob toy!!!!!

Gwen Cooper 426 said...

@Lisa, Hmmm, a reusable Rob HAND Puppet.




(Gwen smiles innocently.)

Cheeky Chops said...

OH I'm soooooo gonna make my own and put it right next to my monitor..THAT is hilarious~!!!

Cheeky Chops said...

OMG I know what I'm gonna do..I'll just make the head part..like a box type thing like that..hole in he bottom..and put it over my webcam when I'm not using it..so I'll have a Robert face on top of my monitor I can stare at all day~!



OK, yes I know it's a bit creepy..but fuck it~!!!

Lisa said...

@ Gwen~

As if there's anything *innocent* about you ;)


Perhaps they can plastic coat little Paper Pattinson like Dixie does with paper plates. That'd protect it from, you know...moisture and...stains....


...again, I'm just sayin'....

annieEvilRobPornPusher said...

I didn't really need to see that! back to the real Rob.

Haystackhair said...

LMAO Marna!!
It never ceases to amaze me the way people will use Rob to make money. LOL

RTP_KJS_Lover said...

@Lisa, @Gwen, @womadsart - I am at work and can't be thinking thoughts like this. Please stop!

DixieRob - BWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAAA!

TheMissMod said...

I'd normally think these things are a tad creepy, but for some reason I found myself defending this! My Mum saw the pic and said 'That's not Robert Pattinson, that's more like a Jedward look!' Gahh. *Facepalm*

wensdazzled by ThePretty said...

that is going to have to be some pretty thick plastic--LOL--maybe they could put sparkles in it too :)

solas said...

Ach--the poor lad. :-( He is becoming a joke and cartoon for the commerical world. :-(

Please let Remember Me be enough for people to see that he can act, that he is an artist and not a caricature.

wensdazzled by ThePretty said...

@solas--so true

nikola6 said...

Oh Gwen...

Now you got my brain a twirling. Hand puppet you say? Fully anatomical? Hmmm...me like.

Or how 'bout a set of 'Rob gloves.' Not mittens, but gloves. We need those fingers loose and FLEXIBLE! And on the middle finger of the gloves (facing inward) would be an imprint of his tongue. Oh. And the middle finger would vibarate. Ya see where I'm going with this?

I know you guys think I'm full of shit but I swear to god, with this particular subject matter and our imaginations, I KNOW we could we could open up a very respectable little sex shop.

Well. Okay. Maybe that 'respectable' thing was a reach.

RTP_KJS_Lover said...

@Solas - It just shows how popular he is. The same thing happens with other actors/celebrities, I don't think it's an insult to his acting ability. All that being said, these people are just trying to make money off of him, which is messed up.

nikola6 said...

Solas...

I know this is really exploitive of Rob but it's really not that big a deal in the sense that this is just the 'fringe' of a very ENTHUSIASTIC fandom. This silliness is not making the big news anywhere. It's faddish and will soon pass.

Stuff like this has been done on plenty of actors, especially those who've played comic book or action/adventure heros, anything that went huge in the pop culture. It's a kinda here today, gone tomorrow and no one remembers any of it.

If Rob goes on to have the career I think he's going to have, all of this silliness will be long left behind in the dust and will not/is not hurting his credibility in Hollywood. But I do agree that the exploiting of him does leave a rather bad taste in ones mouth.

Gwen Cooper 426 said...

Nik, ITA on the shop. How about "successful" in lieu of "respectable"? (Yeah, we all knew that was a stretch...)

Seriously. Could be a very lucrative business! Toys based on what women really want---but were afraid to ask for! (Besides RL Rob, people!)



Hmmm.
Wonder if Rob would like to be a silent partner? LOL.

wensdazzled by ThePretty said...

I see what Solas means though--it would suck to always have people making money off you

but, i do like Nik's glove idea immensly (love those hands of his) and we could do it as a not for profit deal LOL

Kelly Louise said...

Hahahaha.

Oh God.

Juh said...

I know they're making money out of Rob, but of all things this is pretty harmless. It's a picture in a web site, you print it out and build it yourself.It's not like they're for sale.
And there was a pool to choose whose PaperToy would it be this time, and the fans voted for Rob!
It is just suppose to be funny, it's a Toy, play with it... but not with any wet thing, please, it won't last! LOL

annieEvilRobPornPusher said...

@Gwen, He would be very silent(his mouth would be occupied with our lips and...)Min in the gutter as always ;)

@nik, like your ideas ;D

Untamed said...

WTF is all this? Kate, are you trying to cure me of my Robsession? 'Cause it ain't working!

@Kem - I just read your intent to marry both Nik and me on that other thread! I accept your proposal. I can fake lesbian with the best of 'em.

wensdazzled by ThePretty said...

completly unrelated question--does anyone have any ff rec that are more rob than edward? i've read I'll be your lover too-but haven't found any more like that with both of them

RTP_KJS_Lover said...

@Annie/Gwen - Lips? Which ones.
Yeah, I went there....sorry.

My mind is having a hard time processing all the Rob goodness.
And my inner NB wants to come out and play.

solas said...

I've never noticed anything like this with other actors or movie stars ( I don't equate the 2 as I've explained before), but it could be either because I was living almost like a hermit in a cave for decades, or else because very few impress me enough to notice, or because of the internet now showing things I would not have seen even if I had NOT been living in a cave.

It isn't only the issue of making money of of himself; it is the stupidity and cheapness as I see it.

As I said, I hope he will soon be appreciated as a real talent, and that this garbage will go away. And maybe if he continues with his foot in mouth interviews, those who go for the superficial will leave him aside for some new toy.

jessegirl said...

Are those wonky legs, or did he just get off a horse?

Solas, I love this cigarette, and it's not harming him!

Where's the impregnating stare?
With that, they might have my money. But I'd rather give it to Nik for one of her toys.

If I'd been drinking coffee I, too, would have spurted it onto the keyboard. In a mindless, childish way it's kinda cute.

Missed the chest hair. Gotta get another look.

annieEvilRobPornPusher said...

@CL LMAO,
Laughed so hard that I can't breath.I say both ;D

It's so early there :( You still at work I suppose.

Juh said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Juh said...

What if it was a Paper Toy of Edward and not Rob, is it making money out of him or Summit?
LOL
Oh 'cause there is one!

LTavares2011 said...

LOL
Oh!!!!! Rob paper toy, with dark glasses and a cigarette. (LOL )

nikola6 said...

Yes Gwen...

I do believe with that sick, twisted little mind of his, that we could indeed talk him on board and if we can get him drunk enough (man, that's gonna be alot of beer), get him to sign the papers to bankroll the whole thing. As I said earlier, he's making money now and need to start thinking about investments.

A film production company? Oh pish Rob. The real money is in sex toys. Everybody knows that. Tell you what big guy, we'll even get you one of those horse contraptions with the tail. That's right. Oh look. Now he's interested.

I'm glad you ladies like these ideas because I think were on to something. 'Course I always think I'm on to something. Now if I could just figure out what.

And yeah Jules...
I accepted Kem's proposal yesterday. Yanno, I've considered lesbianism at certain intervals during my life, but...I just couldn't ever seem to muster up the behavior. But I do try to keep my options open and in the immortal words of the Katie Scarlett O'Hara...

Tamarrah is anatha daay!

I only have one request...
I always said if I ever got married, I would not walk down the aisle to the tune of the wedding march. No sireee. I wanna walk down that aisle to Alfalpha singing...

"I'm In The Mood For Love"

Cheeky Chops said...

*Runs into Jule's arms*

Ahhh my fake lesbian wife..there you are~! How I do lurve you too..I guess we'll keep Robert tied to the bed and only let him up for human functions..oh and to let him watch us take a bath..LOL

Seriously, I'll be the best fake lesbian husband ever :)..cause u know.."I'm completely asexual."..Ha~!

Love Thyself ;)

Cheeky Chops said...

Ha Nik..and I always said I would wear black with white lingerie underneath..yall wear white with black..SCHMEXYYYYY ;)

Ah it would be a great wedding..LOL

Lisa said...

@ Gwen & Nikola~

You would definitely need Rob for this venture of yours. After all, you need exact measurements and castings for...uh...things....

hornycorn hag said...

Hmmmmm.... needs his shirt miss-buttoned.

wensdazzled by ThePretty said...

@Nik-LOL--like alphalfa idea :)

Cheeky Chops said...

Hahahahaha Nik..just looked it up on youtube..PRICELESS~!!!

Juh said...

Totally agree!

Hmmmmm.... needs his shirt miss-buttoned.

MsTaurus14 said...

He almost looks like he could be a character on South Park, 'cept the head part is to square.

Untamed said...

Nik - LMAO @ keeping your options open. It'll take the both of us and maybe even additional help to handle Kem.

Stephanie said...

At least this isn't quite as freaky as the pillow-thing. Bizarre, yes, but not too freaky-weird.

Fiftyshadesofpink said...

Seriously - people sit at desks designing this shit.
And then other people come along and say, "Yeah, that looks great, lets sell them!"
And then (presumably) more people come along and pay real cash for them?
I am utterly mystified...

Unknown said...

This is NOT FOR SALE!!! This is from a blog about pop culture, the owner is a graphic desinger and he does one paper toy every week for a choosen celebrity, and you can print FOR FREE!!! he's not selling anything.
click here to see his work http://rabiscopop.virgula.uol.com.br/?cat=440
and here is the download to robpaper toy: http://rabiscopop.virgula.uol.com.br/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/Pattinson_IMPRESSAO.jpg

Cheeky Chops said...

@Jules-just a certain man named Robert..or B.O.B as I like to call him sometimes..LOL ;)

Fiftyshadesofpink said...

OK, I've re-read and see they're not for sale.
Still horrendous, though.

K.W said...

It's very funny.
I want one for my desk.

Anonymous said...

okay.. I have to admit that I saw the Paper Pattinson a few days ago and already have one standing in my room!! <3
and he is soo cuTe ♥ my personal Robert Pattinson in my room!!! (:

 
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