Gossip Cop Looks into Ok Magazine - Robert and Kristen Split



From Gossip Cop

OK! Mag Robsten “Split” Claim Reaches New Depths

Hold on to something, Robsten fans! It’s Wednesday, which means OK! magazine has another “Twilight Exclusive” – and this one’s a gem.

As reported widely, this past Saturday “Eclipse” cast and crew held a rollicking wrap party at the Vancouver Aquarium. The tabloid claims a “brooding” Robert Pattinson arrived alone and left after only 45 minutes, wearing shades and a baseball cap. Why was Rob sad? Well, “sources” tell OK! Kristen Stewart “has shockingly pulled the plug on their romance.”

Yup. OK! has the “exclusive.” Let’s run down some of the key problems the tab cites.

According to a “friend of the couple,” Rob “was talking marriage,” while the still-teenaged Kristen “has a lot more living to do.”

Stewart also supposedly felt as though she was giving Rob too much of her time at the expense of friends and family, with the “pal” saying, “Kristen realized she was giving Rob all her attention to the exclusion of everyone else.”

Then there’s rehashed Taylor Talk. Dredging up months-old rumors that were wrong then and wrong now, OK! somewhat creepily uses “the buff physique of 17-year-old co-star Taylor Lautner” to invent a rivalry between Lautner and Pattinson for Stewart’s affections. On a night she supposedly went out with some girlfriends (sans Pattinson), Stewart “was saying Taylor keeps getting bigger and bigger and bigger… She shot some physically intimate stuff with him earlier that day and she couldn’t help noticing his bod. His hot bod.” Yeah, the same hot bod that OK! claims in an item four pages earlier is half of a “heating up” romance with Taylor Swift.

Then there’s the problem of geography. With two months to go “before work starts” on “Breaking Dawn” (um, wrong), Stewart and Pattinson also had supposed “tension” over whether to return to Los Angeles (Stewart’s choice) or London (Rob’s).

Plus, Stewart is “jealous” of the attention Pattinson receives from female fans – a jealousy that has supposedly “ignited some dramas” at the pair’s hotel and during a night out at a Vancouver bar.

And now here comes the best part.

After rattling off this series of, ahem, dubious reasons for the Pattinson and Stewart “split,” OK! turns in an escape worthy of Houdini.

“However, don’t drive a stake into their hearts just yet.”

Wait, what?

“Rob and Kristen would experience terrible withdrawal if they went their separate ways,” the rag’s source “predicts.”

Um… did Gossip Cop miss something?

The cover shows a torn photo of Pattinson and Stewart with “SPLIT!” plastered across it. The story’s headline says the same thing. The sub-head claims, “Kristen calls it quits.” The article itself throws theory after theory at the wall to make the claim stick.

But there… buried twenty-two paragraphs into the story, a “friend” says Stewart “just wants to hit the pause button.” Oh, and don’t be surprised, the tab says, when during promotion for “New Moon” and filming for “Breaking Dawn” “the chemistry will likely fire up again.”

Excuse Gossip Cop while we stand and applaud.

Well done, OK!

So a possible relationship into which the mag had zero insight, and which it breathlessly claims just ended in supposed “heartbreak,” might possibly be reversed almost immediately? Perhaps even by next week’s cover?

Brilliant!

By the way, Gossip Cop contacted Stewart’s representative, who laughed and asked of OK!, “Do you really consider them a news source?”

Enough said.

22 comments:

Babs said...

This crap is really getting annoying, and old.
They've written anything and its opposite and they never got it right, so maybe it's time to stop??

Angie said...

If I would not get arrested, I would walk into the stores and set fire to the ragmags!

Well, there is also the issue of burning the stores down. Not sure that would go over, well. LOL

However, I would feel so much better! heehee ;)

solas said...

They add the little caveats to cover themselves, in case anything happens, they can say they predicted it. As I've said before, if you have or find these ragazines, cut any good photos and then donate the rest for (excuse the crudeness) toilet paper.

Emily said...

That's not a bad idea ADM...

We need to set up some sort of fund to bail people out of jail. You know, for illegal things done in the name of Rob.

That could cover a whole variety of offenses...

drabrasil said...

welllll.. ROBSTEN no need any prove anymore after last months events or whatever... but this BS mag is terrific! LMAO!!!

SluttyPattz said...

Totally ADM and Emily we definitely need to set up a fund for Rob related offenses.

Solas - toilet paper is exactly what I think of OK.

solas said...

Emily--sure and we can add obsession about Rob, or Robsession, to the law books along with the Twinky plea, or under the insanity (temp or permanent) plea.

Emily said...

LOL solas! I think toilet paper might be above these magazines actually.

Haha! Instead of claiming insanity you could claim you were ROBsessed at the time of the crime. I'm sure a female judge or jury would understand.

SluttyPattz said...

I am so sorry judge, I don't know what came over me, I mean I guess Robsanity is my only plea.

RPLover said...

where's RPG? she's going to start the magazine NotOk and I'd like to be one of her columnists! ;)

LOL these people watch waaaaay too many soap operas!! Marlana as a demon was more believable.

Ana73 said...

next week's headline "rob & kristen rekindle romance while promoting new moon" with the same pic without the tear in the middle. this is only get worse this coming month, i hope they can all stay sane through out all of this craziness.

Angie said...

Well, let's team up with RPG, and start NotOk. Then we can tour the country, getting photos of ourselves catching idiots in the process of buying ragmags. We will have a column titled ARE YOU A MORON?

Emily said...

LOL @ ADM!! Perfect.

You could also feature a "Douchebag of the Week" that highlights the writers of these articles.

Maryann said...

LOL I gotta say though, I love how GossipCop repeatedly debunks OK mag and OK mag turns the blind eye and carries on merrily with their nonsense lol. This stuff is like a sitcom! LMAO!

Angie said...

Good idea Emily! LOL

If we keep it up we can easily fill NotOk. I am sure there are many more interesting columns to be written. haha

Mars said...

Oh jeez. I liked the disclaimer at the end. OK!'s always thinking...

jmm4832 said...

In the next week or so OK will read "Kristen and Taylor have a tryst during NM promotions in Brazil and Mexico, while Rob and Chris Weitz hook up," LOL.

Athena said...

And these are the people Charlie Bewley just had an interview with... I hope he won't regret it... if I were him, I'd make sure they write what I said word for word and if they don't, I'd sue.

Be careful, Charlie: they soothe you with honey words and kill you with poisonous print!

rpattzgirl survived Rob! said...

I love the magazine ideas!

Douchebag of the week and are you a moron!!
Lmao!!

How about how much crack Did you smoke? (chandlers voice)

RPLover said...

good ideas for the mag, ladies! it's gonna be hard to narrow it down to just one douchebag, though! LOL give the word and I'll start the investigation ;)

Anonymous said...

I've read so much stuff about Robsten during the past couple of months (last 3 months to be exactly) that sometimes I'm not even sure if what I remember about it is true or fiction so I'm gonna ask you something. By the time they went to the KOL concert, I think I read a whole report about it, it was from Gossip Cop. They said they talked to Kristen's manager about a possible relationship between her and Robert, and her manager said "there's nothing going on there", or something like that. I think I read it here but I'm too lazy to look for it. Am I imagining things or wtf?

That was a f-ing long paragraph, so sorry for that.

Devi said...

I feel like I'm reading the whole Twilight Saga again. He wants to get married but she doesn't and so they slipt bla bla bla... Worst movie promotion ever. I don't even think, they're going out, honestly...

 
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